Letter to a Stranger
A few years ago, I would never have imagined you would feel like an honorary part of the family; as you were a complete stranger to us at that point.
In August 2018, there was a UK-based, then European-wide and finally further round the globe to the US, search for a blood donor match for our son, Ben, whom, in June of that year, had been diagnosed with Acute Myeloid Leukaemia.
The waiting was anxiety-inducing and all we could do, was wait. It didn’t occur to us that there weren’t that many people on the stemcell register, or that there might only be a few opportunities for Ben. It was only when I heard that ‘Ben’s white caucasian and therefore has a much easier chance of finding a donor,’ that I realised what a truly serious situation we were really in and what about all the other people waiting, too, of all different backgrounds and nationalities? Would they not have just as easy a chance of having their life saved as Ben?
It was when we were at Work Up before transplant, that in amongst all the tests Ben had to go through, all the important meetings we attended and information we were given, we were told about you. We were told that you had confirmed and had ‘signed on the dotted line.’ You, a complete stranger to us, had said ‘yes.’ You had agreed to step up in the hope of saving someone’s life; a life of someone you didn’t know.
I spent a few quiet moments in the meeting we were told about you, crying in gratitude of your kindness for our family; of your courage to step up and to go ahead with the donation of your beautiful stemcells for our son.
To be told that there is a donor for your child, when you know their life is threatened and could end in days and weeks without it, means the world to us and any parent in this situation.
I want you to know, two years and a bit after Ben’s stemcell transplant, that you afforded us ten extra months with our son, ten more months that Leukaemia would doubtless have stolen away from us, had you not stepped in. You afforded our family time and my goodness, what an unbelievably precious gift that is and was for us.
To us, you are an Angel. To us, you will always be part of our family for the gift you gave, even though we do not know you and will likely never meet you.
Even though the transplant didn’t save Ben’s life in the end, we are so grateful that you tried. Not all transplants work, but in those ten months, Ben was able to be home; he was able to play and bicker and have fun with his sisters; gently and quietly, as a transplant takes its toll on the body. He was able to go out for a walk in our local woods with a dear friend of his. He was was able to cycle a little and he was able to enjoy his ‘Make A Wish,’ which saw him receive a message from Thor, the God of Thunder, himself, Chris Hemsworth! He was able to spread the message of the importance of stemcell donors on local TV and radio and he was able to enjoy his 12th Birthday with friends and family, albeit in back in hospital.
You made this happen and we couldn’t be more grateful.
Love to you, dear soul and here’s hoping there’s many more like you in the world. What a wonderful world it would be xxx
